Avoidance

So I took a class on The Art and Practice of Living with Nothing and No One Against You. We covered the basics over 4 weeks and I got the workbook. I planned to do the 21-day practice starting when the class ended. I was looking forward to continuing the process with my classmates.

Before starting the worksheets, you are supposed to do a self-assessment. You do another one at the end of the 21 days. I started to read the instructions for the assessment ... and I fell asleep! Sure, I worked late that day and my eyes were tired, but, really?

Well, I won't let myself do a worksheet until that assessment is done. This is now 2 weeks later and it's still not done. Folks, this isn't procrastination. It's avoidance, plain and simple.

I  thought I was taking the class for spiritual growth. I thought I was going to dig deep and discover more about myself and how my subconscious thinks. Apparently my subconscious is happy with the way things are, mainly that it runs my reactions while my conscious mind remains in the dark. Hmmm.

I think I am going to have to show it who is in charge here. Excuse me. I have a self-assessment to finish.

My Story

We read the Daily Word each morning at the start of our work day at Unity Worldwide Ministries. The “word” for Monday, March 1, 2011, was My Story.  During the time of silence, I started thinking about how differently I see people from how they see themselves and vice versa.

I see people as capable, loving, confident, etc. yet when I tell them that, they are surprised and start explaining that they “really” are insecure, not as good as I think they are, etc. Funny, but it works that way with their opinions of me too. I don’t think of myself at all in the positive terms that others think of me.

Why is there such a disconnect? I think it’s because others can’t hear my monkey mind and I can’t hear theirs. Wouldn’t it be nice to become deaf to the negative chatter in our minds, or to have an off/off switch? (Why would you ever want to turn it on?)

They see me as how I show up, not how the Negative Nellie inside my head tells me I am. I wish I had a pair of earphones that could override that inner whine with a positive stream of affirmations. The hard task is to shift our inner critics into coaches so that our inner stories match the outer stories of how we show up.

We are so much better than we give ourselves credit for. For today, I will rewrite My Story from the perspective of my divine Coach and champion. I am created in the image of God, therefore those attributes such as magnificence, love, health, vitality, creativity, joy, etc. all belong to me too.

What story can we write with those words? I’ll bet it’s one we would much rather listen to all day than the tired, old story we have now. I’d love to hear your new stories.